The First Step

A prelude to small, brave attempts and finding the path.

Hello, 

Last January, after I made an exit from a storied company after a decade long career, I declared a year off work. Naturally, now that the time has passed, the question I am asked most frequently is, “What’s next?” The truth: what is next is still unfolding and I don’t have a simple answer.

I’m relishing in the now, much like I described in this post five months ago, but also finding my forward momentum. I’m immersing myself in all forms of storytelling (new books, TV & film, podcasts, theater), discovering art, hibernating when necessary, writing bad poetry, playing the piano, learning and loving love, making incremental changes, and documenting the tiny details of my days. 

I am becoming someone new and more myself simultaneously. That’s been the goal, anyway. The core of my soul is the same—and I’m enjoying excavating her. With that, there are also parts of me I’m meeting for the first time and she both terrifies and excites me. Over time, I hope to share more reflections from my year of rest and exploration. 

As for the glowing future, this space can be where its shape is dreamed up, manifested and recorded in real time. 

And for what it’s worth, despite the unknowns I do know what I desire. A year with more: heart expansion, care, imperfection, art, play, magic, spirituality, sensuality, color, community, liberation, and self-expression. A year filled with emphatic yeses!

Two days ago, Sandra Cisneros visited the Brooklyn Public Library’s Central Branch to discuss “The House on Mango Street” for its 40th anniversary. She was so alive and affirming, delivering gems more quickly than I could document them all. Before she signed my copy of her poetry collection “Woman Without Shame,” she asked, “Are you a writer?” Perhaps she asked that of everyone on the 100-person line, but the question still felt personal. She left me with: write, then share.

I regret losing the many ideas that have solely lived (and died) in my head because I didn’t have the courage to start. To express. 

So, this is my start. A soft, brave attempt at sharing my intimate musings and imperfect art. 

We’ll see how this path (I) unfolds.

Until the next time, soon,

Noelia